February 2012
In order to conceptualise the universe of stars and galaxies, we need to imagine a scale model. Let’s start with Earth. The features of the stellar universe are so big that we must make Earth very small in our scale model. Let’s reduce the size of Earth so that it’s bigger than most molecules but smaller than most dust-motes floating in a beam of sunlight in your room....
Most things attached to me ache and I can’t hear properly, my nose won’t stop running and I’m cold and hungry and I feel too sick to eat properly. I’m reading posts about white privilege and how underage sex can’t be consensual and is always rape and it’s making me want to go and cuddle a puppy or something because I feel like total shit.
Total shit.
Please...
“We.”
I don’t want to accept responsibility and apologise for actions I never committed, I also don’t want to take credit for actions I never committed. I don’t understand my connection to one particular section of the human race, I can only understand my connection to either the whole human race or none of it, either the entire universe or none of it.
I...
Oh please don’t make me go to work, I want to hide my face in a sink of cold water and sleep for three more hours.
My arms are so heavy.
Please.
Last night I got home from work and fell asleep on a pile of ironing for an hour before Luke got home, switched on the light, poured all of the rum into the coke bottle and handed it to me.
What I’m saying here, is that it’s all Luke’s fault.
We drank some and internetted irresponsibly and inevitably I gave a speech on youth and freedom in an attempt to get Luke to agree to...
we so drank
Chanel No. FUCK
I once applied for a job in Subway and the application form was small so I did what I could with the space. Under ‘qualifications’ I think I only included three GCSE’s, which were all irrelevant ones; History: B, Graphic Design: C, Religious Studies: A. And in spite of Luke daring me to write ‘hotdogs’ under interests, I think I held back, and simply put ‘the...
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Ways in which my day was not at all rubbish at...
I met a dog called Star who was the most beautiful, giant, slobbery St. Bernard I’ve ever seen and she would notice that I was holding out my hand to pat her and lunge at me with such glorious, droopy enthusiasm that I got into a conversation with the owner.
The conversation was mostly just “She’s so beautiful!”
I had three-bean soup for lunch and it was so glorious that...
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Ways in which my day was rubbish:
The big boss was in, so no fun. No slacking, no snacking, no giggling for an hour at somebody’s bad impression of a customer.
Which I guess is something I can deal with, but, there wasn’t even any work to do, so we just all had to put on a serious face without there being anything to get stuck into. We just sort of, bounced around, angry looking.
My leg hurt.
My colleagues...
Listening to Heart fm for eight hours straight...
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The past couple of nights have consisted of getting home from work, eating really good food and getting light headed on hardly any rum.
“hardly any” and I notice the bottle’s nearly finished.
I decided to give up meat for lent, because I’ve no self-discipline or will power and I’d like to practice. I considered giving up sweets or chocolate but as I stood at...
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I`m at work and I can`t access tumblr properly on my phone. I`m sorry
he`s taking over my tumblr. Look at the big, bearded, beautiful
bombardment. He is lovely, that`s true, but he did punch me in the arm
last night.
I`ve got a bruise and everything.
What a cunt.
Can’t decide if drinking rum in the shower is a new high or a new low.
At least it’s not a bacon latte, I guess.
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